There were no new messages in her lesbinator.com inbox.
Michelle sighed. Another night of unanswered messages. What a waste. She could almost sense another long early-morning session of online-chess, and Kimya Dawson. She'd be doing another look-see through her battery of paid-porn picture sites, too. Cytherea, and Lucy Daily, first. Her desk clock beeped at her, reminding her that it was time for another handful of pills, yet again.
She could hear her mother stirring, downstairs. Doubtlessly, on the hunt for food by fridgelight. More foraging was done at midnight, than any other time. Michelle turned her attention back to MSN, where the only person online at this hour was always Ted.
“ted.... ru lookin at pron 2?” she typed. “can u tell me if theres any1 new 2 see?”
Ted didn't respond; maybe he was sleeping? Maybe she could scare up someone new, on a realtime chat, somewhere. She googled around for a while, not finding anything she'd want to play with. Eventually, she went back to lesbinator.com, to go see if she could find some matches out-of-town. There were always chicks in Toronto she could date; it seemed like the only women who'd want her were ones too far away to ever see her in-person.
“hai, chesly. Wud u wanna talk 2 me? Im 25, &i like stuff like Oprah.”
“hello diane. Im 22/f/BC. Wud u wanna talk 2 me?”
“26/f/BC – wht ru?”
“teddddddddddddd. Anser me!!!!!!”
She'd once been told by a male ex that she'd be more likely to pick up a frog, than another woman. She'd been slightly confused about that, at the time. She could pick up guys, anytime. Why not a woman?
The alarm went off again; it was set, just in case she got too wrapped up in internet shit to take her meds. “Okay, okay,” she told it, shutting it off for a second time. Rising to her feet, she paused at the foot of the counter, to crack her aching back. Hunching at a computer all the time had given her a permanent droop. The row of bottles awaited; one by one, she shotgunned pills. She couldn't actually handle the full set, all at once. She'd choked on them, once, because of those nasty, dissolving vitamin-D ones. It'd put her off the notion, ever since. She kept picturing someone finding her a week later, sprawled on the door, with her mouth packed with pills and puke.
She drank a diet breakfast shake, right out of the bottle. They were never filling, and they usually tasted awful. She had a minifridge up in the room with her, all packed with drinks; usually, she'd get a couple of sandwiches from 7-11 for it, too. She rarely left her room, let alone the house, these days. Michelle spent most of her time awake online, and most of her time asleep on her couch.
Sometimes Ma would come up, and complain about the state of her room. Other times, she would stand outside the door, and yell that Michelle should go outside. “Life is outside, 'Chelle; you're not living, when you're always in here.” What'd she know, anyway? There was plenty of things living online. Thriving, even.
Ted would likely be back, around 5 AM, or so. The real test of character was whether or not she'd last until then, between being low on Pepsi, and not wanting to go downstairs for more snacks. What to do, for three hours? Watch a movie, maybe? There was always Repo!, she'd liked that, when she'd seen leaked webcam footage, last week. Seeing as that had cut out, partway, she'd been thinking of torrenting a better copy. She'd liked the costumes, and had made Ted laugh, when she'd told him she couldn't tell who Paris Hilton was playing.
'Chelle farted, a lonely, hollow sound. It almost echoed, in the quiet room. Luckily, she was surrounded by geisha dolls, posters, and comic books. Those things dulled the fart-sound, and her boredom.
She considered calling Rachael; it would be a daytime-hour, over in Norway. Mom wouldn't like the long-distance charge, but, she'd probably be less anal about it, knowing that she called her sister, for once. Sometimes 'Chelle would get depressed, thinking about her more-successful little sister; Rachael was living it up, in a Norwegian art college. 'Chelle had tried learning French, once. Rachael had tried to help, giving pointers, and the like. She'd never had the knack for languages. 'Chael was better at most things, despite 'Chelle trying harder.
Ma would always say that she didn't have favorites. 'Chelle wondered about that, being surpassed by a sibling 5 years her junior. Wouldn't Ma prefer a daughter more like 'Chael, in reality?
She cracked her neck, and her jaw. She felt like she was catching another flu. Being sick would put a real damper on trying to focus on the computer screen. Sitting in a chair would require more effort than usual, too. Maybe her back would like the break, getting to lay down some, for once? That made her think she should consider a nap; it'd been a day or two, since she'd last bothered to sleep. The pouches under her eyes were a testament to the few hours a day that she normally'd invest.
It was going to be a real dull 3 hours, until Ted came back online.
“txt me if u cum on & im not here,” she left for him, changing her status to “Away”. She moved to the couch; she'd gotten rid of the bed, because she couldn't put stuff under a single mattress. She had a small collection of Japanese card games stored under the couch. She'd tried to learn Japanese, the one year, but, like French – Japanese just seemed too hard to crack. She'd never thought to give away the collection, preferring to keep it, to look at.
Her eyes felt sandy. Laying on the couch, she pulled a cover over herself, ignoring the need for Visine. She decided to leave on the Kimya Dawson. It could be mellow enough to lull her to sleep.
The computer made a small ping-noise. Finally, someone had answered.
